************************************************************** * * * CYBERSPACE * * A biweekly column on net culture appearing * * in the Toronto Sunday Sun * * * * Copyright 1999 Karl Mamer * * Free for online distribution * * All Rights Reserved * * Direct comments and questions to: * * * * * ************************************************************** Have you ever been emailed the warning about the dreaded "Good Times Virus?" The legend goes it's a computer virus that's transmitted through email. Merely opening the virus-laden message will do all sorts of terrible things to your computer and harddrive -- from scrambling your files to putting your computer into an "infinity loop" which burns out your CPU. There is no Good Times virus, of course. It's pretty hard to write a text message that executes and formats PC, Mac, and Unix harddrives. (Strangely, Microsoft and Netscape are working hard to make this "dream" come true with their ill-conceived notion of creating email clients that automatically read HTML and execute Java and ActiveX applets.) The FAQ at www.public.usit.net/lesjones/goodtimes.html does a pretty good job of explaining why there's no need to panic. I was reading the FAQ one day and became fascinated by a section that traces the hoax's origin. An interesting theory is the hoax was a deliberate attempt to stop a piece of electronic chain mail that was going around in the early '90s called "Good Times." If you got the chain email, you were to send 10 copies of Good Times to friends. Within days, you would be rewarded with good luck. Someone reasoned the only way to stop this foolishness was to inculcate in the minds of users that Good Times was actually a virus. Don't even think about reading it! Clever. Unfortunately, the solution became the problem. The FAQ got me thinking. Could we create a similar hoax to stop other irritating bits of email? For example, the "Make Money Fast" pyramid swindle has been an ever present irritant. Since a hoax might prevent untold numbers of people from losing money in a mathematically unsound Ponzi scheme, I'd wager this cure is the lesser of two evils. What do you think? My suggested hoax email follows at the end of this article. To lend it authenticity, giving it a feel like it was written by someone not entirely in the know, I've liberally peppered it with random streams of exclamation marks, all caps, quotes, and a reoccurring need to state the obvious. The lack of real dates, and instead vague references to a Wednesday and some time period three weeks previous, is a nod to the Craig Shergold urban legend. If you've got the Good Times email, you've probably got the Shergold one too. Craig Shergold wants to receive a record number of greeting card before he dies of terminal cancer in 6 months. People have been passing that one around for nearly ten years. Should you choose to retype this and spread it, I suggest putting in several levels of those ">" quote symbols to further reduce readability and make it seem like you're merely passing on information from other sources, sources that have clearly checked this information's authenticity. Right? =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Subject: Warning Do Not Add Your Name To A Make Money Fast List!!!!!!!! The FBI and RCMP have released warnings last Wednesday concerning a matter of MAJOR importance to any "regular" user of the Internet. In the last three weeks, 22 PEOPLE in the USA and Canada have been found MURDERED. The only "connection" the FBI and the RCMP have been able to make is victims ADDED their NAME to the bottom of a MAKE MONEY FAST message. These Make Money Fast messages are "played" by adding your name and HOME ADDRESS to the bottom of a list, removing the name of the person at the top, and sending him $5-$50 dollars. Authorities speculate organized "criminals" are using these lists to track down their VICTIMS, murder them HORRIBLY, and take whatever cash they have already received from the Make Money Fast list. Those with their name CLOSEST to the "bottom" of the list are MOST at risk!!! The FBI speculates it's because those with their NAME at the bottom are those "most" likely to still be at the listed residence. Unfortunately, most NOVICE computer users will not realize how dangerous it is to post your home address to the net so PLEASE spread this message and inform other users NOT to "play" the make money fast game!!!! No ONE seems immune to these blood thirsty killers, warns Stuart Hodgkins of the RCMP (shodgkins.rcmp@disney.ca). So don't give them a TARGET. Do not let them kill another living human being!!!!!!!!! Once your name is on one of these lists, you can "never" get it taken OFF!!!!!!! God HELP YOU if your name is on one of these lists already. Warn YOUR "friends" of this newest threat to the Internet. DOING it now could "save" a lot!!!